When you are in Love you can't fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams.

A short story found online.

"A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage. They were a loving couple and the boy was the apple of their eyes. When the boy was around two years old, one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle open. He was late for work so he asked the wife to cap the bottle and keep it in the cupboard. The mother, preoccupied in the kitchen, totally forgot the matter.

The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle and, fascinated with its color, drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed, the mother hurried him to the hospital, where he died. The mother was stunned. She was terrified how to face her husband.

When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child, he looked at his wife and uttered just four words.

What do you think were the four words?

The husband just said "I Love You Darling"

The husband's totally unexpected reaction is proactive behavior. The child is dead. He can never be brought back to life. There is no point in finding fault with the mother. Besides, if only he have taken time to keep the bottle away, this will not have happened. No
point in attaching blame. She had also lost her only child. What she needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband. That is what he gave her.

Sometimes we spend time asking who is responsible or who to blame, whether in a relationship, in a job or with the people we know. We miss out some warmth in human relationship in giving each other support. After all, shouldn't forgiving someone we love be the easiest thing in the world to do? Treasure what you have. Don't multiply pain, anguish and suffering by holding on to forgiveness.

If everyone can look at life with this kind of perspective, there would be much fewer problems in the world.

Take off all your envies, jealousies, unwillingness to forgive, selfishness, and fears and you will find things are actually not as difficult as you think."

:)

1 step forward and 2 steps back. That's probably the worse feeling you'll ever have but the thing is shit happens all the time. Fortunately at the end of the day, you know that there're people who care for you and people who reaffirm. And thanks for every moment, every word you've said and everything you've done.

At the end of the day, i prefer freedom over restriction. I prefer choice over instructions. And most importantly. The time for me to be responsible for my actions. For that, everything else won't matter that much. You excel in your field, you excel as a person.

With that, i shall say hi to blisters and abrasions at the end of this road. 55th bslc delta.

And everything can be explained by anything in shutter island. Overarching view of our society. You'll never know who is exactly right and who is exactly wrong.

i just want you to know, i know where you're coming from.

There are 2 ways of looking at things in life. One way is to be completely soaked in grief and misery, constantly questioning oneself why things aren't going the way they want it to be. The other is to take it and face up to the challenge, pitting yourself against the impossible and your own fear. The choice is often up to us. I rather the latter option.

Tomorrow's going to be a challenge. And that's why i'm living for tomorrow.

And all challenges end up with one simple ending. Being conquered.

Sometimes you just wonder why you feel like this. I want my song of sorrow and grief.

Setbacks make you think. And sometimes it paralyses you.

I think i'm caught in between both now.

and there goes the 2 goals set for the year.

Sometimes you just want the world to stop spinning. Everything should stop momentarily and allow us to pause for a moment and think. Carpe Diem. Achieve what we want in life and seize any chance possible because we'll never know when the next one comes.

think big and achieve your dreams. :)

Never let you go-

Justin Bieber

Oohhh noo, ohh noo, ohhh
They say that hate has been sent
So let loose the talk of love
Before they outlaw the kiss
Baby give me one last hug

Theres a dream
That i've been chasing
Want so badly for it to be reality
And when you hold my hand
Then i understand
That its meant to be

Cuz baby when you're with me
Its like an angel came by, and took me to heaven
(Like you took me to heaven)
Cuz when i stare in your eyes
It couldnt be better

So let the music it blast
We gon' do our dance
Praise the doubters on
They dont matter at all
Cuz this lifes to long
And its much to strong
So baby no for sho'
Ill never let you go

I got my favorite girl
Not feelin' no pain
(No pain, no pain, no pain)
Oh no, dont have a care in the world
Why would i, when you are here
Theres a moments i've been chasin
And i finally caught it out on this floor

Baby, theres no hesitation,
No reservation by taking a chance and more
Ohh noo, because

Its like an angel came by, and took me to heaven
(Like you took me to heaven)
Cuz when i stare in your eyes
It couldnt be better
(I dont want to go, no no no)
So let the music it blast
We gon' do our dance
Praise the doubters on
They dont matter at all
Cuz this lifes to long
And this loves to strong
So baby no for sho'
Ill never let you go

Its like an angel came by, and took me to heaven
(Like you took me to heaven)
Cuz when i stare in your eyes
It couldnt be better
(I dont want you to go, no, no, so)

Take my hand, lets just dance
Watch my feet, follow me
Dont be scared, girl im here
If you didnt know, this is loooovee

(So let the music it blast)
(We gon' do our dance)
(Praise the doubters on)
(They dont matter at all)
(Cuz this lifes to long)
(And its much to strong)
(So baby no for sho')
(Ill never let you go)

Ill never let you go, gooooo
Ill never let you go,

(Oh yeah, oh yeah)

Ohhhh

Ill never let you go,
Ohh no, ohh noo, ohhh

Ill never let you go

And i'll never let you go. Never.

POP!

Maybe that spells the end of the "honeymoon period" in my army journey. For some reason or another, the euphoria of passing out hasn't really hit me yet. It seems like just another break i have every weekend where i just feel lethargic and sleep is of the first priority.

It's been a really long long journey i feel. Like what people always say, it's how the friends around you that affects your life journey. And to no surprise, it's the same for the BMT phase. At times, i wonder why i was unlucky. At times, i wonder why everything didn't go my way but i guess everything was planned to be like this. You can say it's karma or something but yea. At least i don't need to face some people again and hopefully in the future as well. I'm just keeping my fingers crossed and hoping that my next phase doesn't suck in THAT particular aspect.

Well enough of my ranting about my army experience.

Shall continue soon.

Thanks for everything and for those 19, they mean everything.

Simple pleasures of life.

It's only when you get pushed beyond your maximum that you'll finally realise your true value and to see yourself in different light.

It's mere 5 days but the emotional and physical stress is beyond what i initially expect. And sometimes, it's those around you that matters the most. Some bring you down, while others help you all the way.

Thanks bros.

And thanks to those around. Especially those special ones.

you are the reason why i keep moving on.

it takes some time for people to change but when it goes over the top, i'll blow.

it's the start of the new beginning, i dare challenge you to create more troubles and piss me off further, let's see who wins the final battle. :)

enjoy meanwhile. mate.

Sometimes the most important thing in a whole day is the rest we take between two deep breaths, or the turning inwards in prayer for five short minutes.

~Etty Hillesum

Lucky

-Jason Mraz/Colbie Cailat

Do you hear me? I'm talking to you
Across the water across the deep blue ocean
Under the open sky, oh my, baby I'm trying

Boy I hear you in my dreams
I feel your whisper across the sea
I keep you with me in my heart
You make it easier when life gets hard

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again
Ooh ooh ooh

They don't know how long it takes
Waiting for a love like this
Every time we say goodbye
I wish we had one more kiss
I'll wait for you I promise you, I will

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again

Lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

And so I'm sailing through the sea
To an island where we'll meet
You'll hear the music fill the air
I'll put a flower in your hair

Though the breezes through trees
Move so pretty you're all I see
As the world keeps spinning 'round
You hold me right here, right now

I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend
Lucky to have been where I have been
Lucky to be coming home again

I'm lucky we're in love in every way
Lucky to have stayed where we have stayed
Lucky to be coming home someday

Ooh ooh ooh
Ooh ooh ooh, ooh

Sometimes, you just need a spark.

Anyway, happy belated cny and vday:)

Life's a tangled web. You realised that every 1 mistake you make, you gradually move further away from the ideals. The more mistakes you make, the more tangled the string becomes. The more mistakes you make in life, the more complicated it seems to be. Most people are unable to get themselves away from this mess and eventually give up upon themselves. Others attempt to take the easy way out by acting impulsively or allow their inner fears to engulf their souls, leaving them with nothing but fear itself. At the end of it, it does no good at all. In worse cases, things get to the point where it is beyond restoration.

Patience is all it takes sometimes.

still and always be. the best song to listen to when i'm down.:)

light 1 |līt|noun1 the natural agent that stimulates sight and makes things visible.2 understanding of a problem or mystery; enlightenment.6 a person notable or eminent in a particular sphere of activity or place.
It takes time and we all know that. Things that are destined to happen will eventually happen. Some things don't and it's for the greater good. At the end of the day, just enjoy every moment you have because nothing last forever.
101 reasons why you are different.

JoJo
-Shinee

I know that (My baby)
I gotta get over you (I love you)
That's right, that's right (My heart)

거봐 그녈 좀 봐, 나쯤이야 잊는 건 쉽다고
믿고 싶지 않아
oh~ ah~ 잠이 오지 않는 밤 머리 아픈 이 짓이 너무 지겨워
무릎 꿇고 가슴치고 울어봐도
도 안 되는 건 안 되니（eh,eh,eh）

JOJO! 슬픈 음악이 흐를 때 널 생각해 (eh eh eh)
JOJO! 잔인한 너는 왜 지워지지 않냐고

Hey, My JoJo. Love, yes JoJo
Stay! 뭘 잘못했니 I, I was blind
Stay! 두 눈에 밟혀 I, I was blind

So many nights I wonder why
What can I do to make it right
Everything will be alright
so Jo Jo just tell me why

울고 싶진 않아 oh~ ah~ 깊이 할퀴어 버린 맘
머리 아픈 이 짓이 너무 지겨워
취해봐도 그 취한 속을 비워봐도
도 안 되는 건 안되니

JoJo! 이 쓴 음악이 멈출 때 널 보낼래 (eh eh eh)
JoJo잔인한 너는 왜 지워지지 않냐고
Hey, My JoJo. Love, yes JoJo

Stay! 뭘 잘못했니 I, I was blind
Hey, My JoJo. Love, yes JoJo
Stay! 난 모르겠어 아, 아직도

Baby- JoJo 넌 아니, 이리도 차가운 Heart!
Baby Baby 왜 갔니, 울다 지쳐 깨는 꿈

JoJo! 슬픈 음악이 흐를 때 널 생각해 (eh eh eh)
JoJo! 잔인한 너는 왜 지워지지 않냐고
JoJo! 이 쓴 음악이 멈출 때 널 보낼래 (eh eh eh)
JoJo잔인한 너는 왜 지워지지 않니,
않냐고

Hey, My JoJo. Love, yes JoJo
Stay! 뭘 잘못했니 I, I was blind
Hey, My JoJo. Love, yes JoJo
Stay! 두 눈에 밟혀 I, I was blind

the song just got stuck in my head.

fishes at the store, waiting to be sold to the right person.

6 days of fun, laughter, peace and joy. It's going to be mere 2 weeks before we leave this tiny little world for a tiny little spot in tekong.

And now you think back. Extremeness may just kill you before you know it. Perhaps you can say that it allows you to get what you want, it allows you to do whatever you want, i gives you the inner strength to achieve what you wanted. At the end of the day, before you know it, you lose your senses, you lose your thoughts and eventually you lose your friends.

One needs to stay objective and change as he goes. Walk along this journey and constantly change for the better. You learn along the way. Life ain't just a breeze. It's probably worse than a roller coaster ride. It never goes at the same pace throughout. Unlike a roller coaster ride, you get more twists and turns, more unexpected changes that you never foresee. At least for a roller coaster ride, you probably know what's ahead. In life, you never.

Well, change's a constant. And as everything changes over time, let those bad memories leave you and learn from them. Let those good ones stay, because you never know whether it's the last one you'll have.

i want you by my side, side.

Falling sick. -.- be back soon :)

It's just one of those moments that you think about the past.

And yes. Probably it's the release of the o level results or something, i miss the cat high life.

The thing is this, you know when you say you hate it back then you don't mean it. But looking back at how things went in the past, i'm sure it was all worth while. All the rubbish we did, all the nonsense we talked about, the whole typical boys school jokes and everything. I guess it was just part of growing up. i guessed i loved the process, i loved the company, like how we used to make a fool out of a teacher ( yes, not the other way round ) and got away with it because he really deserved it. We were outrageous daredevils, there didn't seem to be any force stopping us from doing what we wanted or stopping us from the way we think.

And perhaps, that's part of growing up.

And i know one thing for sure, the going gets tough. No more immature thoughts. And one thing we really learned: Moderation. Moderation as in doing everything in moderation, neither too little nor too much. You have to learn to distinguish the line between work and play, between what's right and wrong. And perhaps that seems a little too much for us to take sometimes. We cross the lines.

And there goes friendships.

Fortunately for me, those friends that weren't meant to do me any good left or rather let's put it this way: we distanced ourselves from each other. And thanks for those sturdy friendships forged. I don't want anything to change except for us to become closer, and to tolerate each other more. Well mini tiffs will probably do us good, it probably shows that we still care to quarrel.

And yes. We need to know how to differentiate what's black and white now. Sometimes we'll be stuck but just push on. You never know what you're going to get. :D

life's simple pleasures : eating :D

Yes, just push on and go slow. You never know what's ahead. And giving yourself pressure won't help! :)

And everything's not turning out right. I just ain't thinking straight. Maybe it's excessive sleep.

yes. what on earth. whatever.

Once you start, you can't stop. So just carry on. :)

죽기 일초전 (One second before dying)
-Ji Chun Bi Hwa (feat. Taesabiae)

I'll go with the flow.

And 2009 ended bitter sweet.

What a year. It's full of ups and downs, packed with moments of fun, laughter, peace and joy. The wonderful company, our crazy moments, the intense mugging period, A levels and eventually things did come to an end for some stuff. Well i bid goodbye to the wretched A levels but then again it brought us closer not just physically but also emotionally. That emotional attachment with those around me. 2009 couldn't have been better because of you people. Thanks so much to everyone for playing such an integral role.

Well 2009 did allow me to venture into stuff i always wanted to. Things like joining a sports was something on the checklist for 2009 and yes, i did it and enjoyed the entire season. Awesome i would say.

Well, 2009 was probably the year my thoughts matured. Or at least, to some extent. Well. Hatred and love. Two powerful emotions.

And 2009 ended with those fireworks. And the great company. Thanks.

While i take some time to reminisce the past, i look ahead to what's going to come in 2010.

It's going to be a change for the better.

Happy new year once again. XD

2010 needs to get better.

pixelated.

Two is better than one
Boys like Girls ft Taylor Swift

I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought
"Hey, you know, this could be something"
'Cause everything you do and words you say
You know that it all takes my breath away
And now I'm left with nothing

So maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
And maybe two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one

I remember every look upon your face
The way you roll your eyes
The way you taste
You make it hard for breathing
'Cause when I close my eyes and drift away
I think of you and everything's okay
I'm finally now believing

That maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
And maybe two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking two is better than one


I remember what you wore on the first day
You came into my life and I thought, "Hey"

Maybe it's true
That I can't live without you
Maybe two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
And you've already got me coming undone
And I'm thinking
I can't live without you
'Cause, baby, two is better than one
There's so much time
To figure out the rest of my life
But I'll figure it out
When all is said and done
Two is better than one
Two is better than one

Naughty Naughty Christmas
Danger Danger

- Verse 1 -
I've been a naughty boy
I didn't get a toy
Santa Clause left nothin' underneath my tree
He knows that I've been bad
But bein' good just ain't my fad
So here's the thing to do if your just like me
Everybody, pull the shades, lock the door, like you did before

- Chorus -
And have a naughty naughty Christmas and dirty dirty new year
Naughty Naughty Christmas, feelin' peace and all the good cheer
If you haven't got someone you love, love someone your near
And have a naughty naughty Christmas this year

- Verse 2 -
It's too cold to go out today
We'll take a ride in an open slay
I'll do some kissin' underneith the misteltoe
My babies always been the given kind but when she tells me she's my present and she blows my mind
I can't wait but I'm gonna' unwrap her slow
Oh yeah we're gonna have a ball
And we'd like to wish you all...

- Chorus -
A naught naughty Christmas and a dirty dirty new year
Naughty Naughty Christmas, feelin' peace and all the good cheer
If you haven't got someone you love, love someone your near
And have a naughty naughty Christmas this year

- Verse 3 -
A naught naughty Christmas and a dirty dirty new year
Naughty Naughty Christmas, feelin' peace and all the good cheer
If you haven't got someone you love, love someone your near
And have a naughty naughty Christmas

- repeat -

Have a naughty naughty Christmas X2
This year.

Merry xmas everyone:)

And boxing day seems so much nicer than christmas itself :)

Never knew i needed you
Ne-Yo

For the way you changed my plans
For being the perfect distraction

For the way you took the idea that i had
of everything that i wanted to have
and made me see there was something missing...

For the ending of my first begin
(And) For the rare and unexpected friend

For the way you're something that I'd never choose
but at the same time something i don't wanna lose
and never wanna be without ever again...

Chorus:

You're the best thing I never knew I needed
when you appear i had no idea...

You're the best thing i never knew i needed
so now it's so clear i need you here, always...


My accidental happily (ever after)
The way you smile and how you comfort me (with your laughter)

I must admit you were not a part of my book
but now if you open it up and take a look
you're the beginning and the end of every chapter...

Chorus:

You're the best thing i never knew i needed
when you appear i had no idea...

You're the best thing i never knew i needed (that i needed)
so now it's so clear i need you here, always...


Who knew knew that I could be...
So unexpectedly...
Undeniably happy (yeah)
With you right here, right here next to me...

Chorus:

You're the best thing i never knew i needed
when you appear i had no idea...

You're the best thing i never knew i needed (that i needed)
so now it's so clear i need you here, always...

...Now it's so clear, I need you here always

4 days. staying at home. playing fifa on the consoles. not exercising.

Boredom. It better not continue or i'll seriously just. POOM, explode or something.

And it's probably the most boring x'mas week ever. There's no atmosphere at all. -.-

This just gotta be better.

The last tribute's for those i worked with. And this one is for 08s38.

It's been 2 whole years. Thanks for all that's always there when i need you people, despite the fact that i've never been there all the time for you guys. Apologies.

I think this VJ journey's been really a nice one. Like, we started off as strangers from different parts of the nation. I remembered the first day i walked into class and as i sat on the 2nd last row, i was thinking to myself. "WTH" Well that "wth" impression definitely changed as we grew closer. No longer strangers, no longer mere meet and go friends. People say that your best friends will be made during secondary school and maybe junior college, i say it may be the opposite. JC offered me an entirely different view of what life is like. That super big ego decided to retreat by a substantial amount. That selfish, authoritative collin has taken a step back. MCP? declined.

Well, staying in an all boys school may not have been the best of all choices. I'm so not going to quote statistics here, but girls definitely gain lots more from being in a girls school but it's definitely not the same for guys. Despotic? Probably. A common trait for guy school's guys.

Well, i've learned a lot. Cliques do exist everywhere, well one fortunate thing at least is that we still exist as a class. At least pretty much as one. (Or 2/3 if you wanna call it that way) I love how the class blended as one.

SDD was a closure that didn't really seemed like one. It was nonetheless the official one though, i think most of us won't just stop being friends till then.

To beloved BENZENE. I'm not going into the details but yes. bonded as 1. We quarreled, cold war-ed, pissed the shit out of each other, yet we enjoyed the happiest moments together as well. I have no idea why we even started with the " Let's rank your benzene member " "game". I don't believe in such ranking, any form of ranking proves nothing at the end of the day, it just segregates. At the end of the day. I just want us to stay as one. 1.

So yes.

Aloysius Koh. The buddy’s whos there always. Pessimistic. I think you are worse than kenrick. What will life be like if...Life was a little more optimistic. And i wonder. I’m quite sure you’ll do well in everything and be someone up there in no time. Just need to relax a bit and you should be fine. For this 2 years, thanks so much for all and everything. Being a good listening ear, someone who listens to my nonsense and rubbish. Well one point i have to apologise for though. I am not there all the time because i’m irritated by you sometimes, your pessimism just irritates me.:p SO YES! Change for the better. Life isn’t bleak. The only barrier you needa beat is the one up in your head. The one that says. Aloysius, you suck. Come on dude. Life’s a joy and how you enjoy it, how you manage to overcome it. It all depends on you. So yes. Thanks for everything and CHANGE:D

Glen Ang. GBADU. Well who actually started it. I’m so not going to boost your ego, but yes. You aren’t dumb. Definitely seen and proven. Perhaps the only person who’s more hardcore than me by like a million times, the amount of effort you put in to get your academic success is just shocking sometimes. But oh wells. Army’s next. Of all people, you irritated the shit out of me the most, the most insensitive annoying nonsense i’ve seen. What kind of rubbish are you ar. Seriously. Luckily i decided to make peace and yes. Everything became better. I know you are probably enjoying your life in Japan now. I’ve got nothing much to say about you. Seriously. Be more sensitive sometimes :D And yes, enjoy your life and enjoy the time left before army :s

Jasmine Teo. The one that doesn’t get past the thermal detector. high radioACTIVITY. You are one of the most hyperactive person around but you always manage to chill and keep your cool when it’s supposed to be serious. Thanks for being such a wonderful CT rep.:) And thanks for all the advice and everything. Like what you said. The female version of Aloysius.:) Stay high, stay cool and be less emotional at times.:)

Tan Jie Ying. I really don’t know what to say. Can you be less blur? :D HAHAHAHA. Oh wells, i think of the 6 of us, i definitely talk the least to you. Hmm. Watch less dramas and go out more:D And hopefully you’ll enjoy the 8 months break yea? I realised the guy’s won’t have this privilege at all. Like doing whatever you want and stuff. And maybe go learn driving or something. Thanks for being there when we need you and smile more!

Tings. I have too much to say that i’m just beyond words:) Thanks for being there always and yeaps. Ok i really don’t know what to say. You’re definitely one of the closest i’m to and yes. Totally predictable. :) Thanks for everything and i’ll definitely miss the times we all went crazy ( though you went crazier than i did :D ) smiles:)

And those i didn’t manage to thank, like bong, jacq, suni and the rest. Thanks for making it such a wonderful journey and all the best for the future.:) Stay in contact:)

I have no idea what kind of response this post will generate but one thing for sure: I appreciate all those that played an integral part in my life.

So yes. Here it goes.

Let's start with council. It's been really full of ups and downs. Well frankly it started on day 1, orientation. I was really really amazed by everything that was being organised. I still remember myself saying that there is no way i'll ever join council. No way will it be in my priority list. Well the urge to join a sport was really killing me, and i was really certain i’ll never do something that has to deal with the idea of being a student leader. I guess i was proven wrong. It was one of the last choices i had because i knew that it was a backing. At the very most, if i couldn’t find something i like, that will the last choice. I remembered both martin and terence joining ct council and yea, i did give ct council a try. However, at the end of it i chose the crazier of the two. STUDENTS COUNCIL.

Everything feels so long ago, like how we started and stuff like that, but the irony is this: Investiture felt so yesterday. Orientation 2. Nom’s night. Elects Camp. NUS children’s ward visit. Intra-council day. Farewell Assembly. Open House. Senior Dinner and Dance. Orientation 09. Nom’s Camp. Music Fest. Outvest.

It didn’t end there. It definitely didn’t end there.

Redshirting. The most important event in the entire journey.

What matters most isn’t the events itself but the people who was with me all this while. I’m sorry for being insensitive, i’m sorry for being too stubborn. Thanks to all those who believed in me, for those who stood by me all the while. Some friends came by and left, while the few of you people stood by my side always. Thanks once again.

Kenrick Chin. You psychotic manipulative bitch. Psychotic for being by my side and allow me to vent my anger and being receptive to all the nonsense i did. Manipulative for being such a manipulative figure in my life. You turned my life topsy turvy. You created hell. Wth man. And the last one is self explanatory. B-I-A-T-C-H. You know what it means better than i do my friend.:D But somehow you were by my side all this while, you knocked sense into me whenever i was down, you are always there to be my good listening ear. Thanks for all the k-pop madness( though i think i caused the craze with all the random blasting of speakers in the council room ) and the psychotic GAGA fever. One thing for you though. Forgive and forget. You know what i mean. :)

Stacy Kayla Sng. The one and only one( other than me ) who gives the wtf face all the time. Like what Kat said last night before you left. Smile more princess kayla. Dagger eyes will just scare all the guys away. HAHAHA. And your 5 inch heels that scares all the guys away (except for me :D) Ok down to serious business. Thanks for being such an understanding classmate and council mate. Thanks for the care and concern all the time. And by the time you see this, you’ll probably be done with your 1/2 month tour in europe!

Geraldine Quek. How dare you call me a cat. GOLDFISH! :D You and your straightforwardness owns everyone flat. Guess what. Till date, i have no idea why you can get away with all of this. Immunity against all strikes eh. Thanks for being there for me all the time ( though you’ll kill me sometimes when i disappoint:x ) and thanks for all your efforts. Working with you in RECO and SDD was just simply a pleasure. Stay cool eh! But remember. Be less straightforward sometimes. Not everyone can take it :)

Victoria Faith Neoh. The one who’s always predictable. Thanks for being a good listening ear as well and a cool working partner. You made me understand loads of stuff especially these couple of months, you made me feel as if i wasn’t alone. Frankly speaking, we do think the same way sometimes. Yeaps. I guess just follow your heart and do what you think is the best. Well decisions are hard to make but sometimes, you need to make the decision that goes with what you truly believe in. Thanks once again :)

Hannah Rose Murphy. Forever suanning me. One thing i must learn from you though is that always smile. Always. I always wonder how on earth are you able to do that. Like seriously. How can you put on that smile in front of someone you can’t stand. Hmm. Oh wells. Perhaps the person with the highest eq around, you are definitely one person to look up to. ( In terms of eq that is, not h_____ :X) Stay cool!

And two other people.

who left this tiny island.

Katharine Khorazon. Dragon lady. I think you’re one of the most aggressive woman around. However, it’s your aggressiveness that makes you special. Thanks for being one of the most committed and dedicated person around, in whatever you do. Be it those redshirting season ( i missed those times, really. ), be it nom’s camp, be it the mugging period. You are always dedicated. We try to look at things at a larger picture. We put in our 110% in everything. And yes. You’ll be dearly missed. Like seriously. Don’t miss us too much though:D And enjoy your spa and everything. It’ll be 3 mths of enjoyment before we see you back here again!:D

Thomas Lim. The ever irritating “HAHAHAHAHHA! -points at you and laugh like a 90 pointer idiot-” I won’t forget you that’s for sure. And yes frankly speaking, it doesn’t feel as if you left. :x Anyway, all the best for your xmas present! Hoping to hear good news from you as well! And yes. We’ll see you in KL soon so yea. We have to enjoy that period ( before i get into the army)

I know the long list goes on. Special mention to people like xiaowei, nicholas, pengrui, leon and those that i’ve worked with all this while. Thanks for being there always. Even though it’s just mere 2 years, you people played a indispensable role in this torpsy turvy 2 years.

I have so much to say and this is merely just so little that i’ve said. I miss everyone. I miss council. 2 years just went by just like this. At the end of the day, 1+0 will not become 0 because you made a difference in others life. It may not be penned down anywhere, but at the end of the day you know something for sure. You made a difference.

Thanks everyone.

Prom's over. The past, the present, the future. Probably the only event that captures all those moments that remind me of the long lost past, a representative outlook of the present and the impending future. I can't exactly say that it was what i expected, at least it wasn't as bad as i would expect.

The good and bad happened. One thing for sure, at least i learned something.

It's gonna be a long journey ahead, hang on guys. Thanks VJC.

it made me understand where you really stand.

暗示－锺嘉欣

"I LOVE YOU CAUSE I'M A FREE BITCH BABY."

Right. Just those 9 words to sum up my feelings. It's 2 months of pure slacking and resting ( and training up as well ) but i guess i'll simply love it:D

One thing for sure. I need to get some things done :)

i'm not going to waste this 2 months.

Need you now - Lady Antebellum

Picture perfect memories,
Scattered all around the floor.
Reaching for the phone cause, I can’t fight it any more.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind.
For me it happens all the time.

It’s a quarter after one, I’m all alone and I need you now.
Said I wouldn’t call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don’t know how I can do without, I just need you now.

Another shot of whiskey, can’t stop looking at the door.
Wishing you’d come sweeping in the way you did before.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind.
For me it happens all the time.

It’s a quarter after one, I’m a little drunk,
And I need you now.
Said I wouldn’t call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don’t know how I can do without, I just need you now.

Yes I’d rather hurt than feel nothing at all.
It’s a quarter after one, I’m all alone and I need you now.
And I said I wouldn’t call but I’m a little drunk and I need you now.
And I don’t know how I can do without, I just need you now.
I just need you now.
Oh baby I need you now.

You learn from your mistakes and move on. One thing for sure, you get better at it. Not worse at it.
Not giving up till the end :)

너라서 사랑해-채동하

한껏 다 주고 싶은데
빈 손이 미안해져
맘껏 널 보고 싶은데
닿을까 불안해져
널향한 이런 내맘 사랑이라는
두글자로 모자라
나에게 그리움을 가르친 사람

그게 너라서 난 너라서
내게 얼마나 고마운지
아프게 하지마 힘들게 하지마
그래도 니가 좋아
하필 너인지 왜 너인지
내게 묻지말아줘
애태워도 울게해도
그냥 너라서 사랑해

하루 왠 종일 그려도
지겹지 않은 사람
고된 기다림 조차도 즐겁게 하는 사람
너만을 위한 내맘 바보 같다고
놀려되도 괜찮아
내 생에 다신 없을 빛나는 사람

그게 너라서 난 너라서
내게 얼마나 고마운지
아프게 하지마 힘들게 하지마
그래도 니가 좋아
하필 너인지 왜 너인지
내게 묻지말아줘
애태워도 울게해도
그냥 너라서 사랑해

누구도 오지 못하게
가슴에 빈틈 없도록
가득 들어찬 사랑

너라서 너라서 내게 얼마나 다행인지
니가 아니라면 다른사람이면
이토록 사랑할까

너의 가슴에 또 기억에
영원토록 남겨질 단 한사람 단 한사람
그게 너라서 감사해

It's.. ALMOST OVER. :D
Reality hasn't really sunk in i suppose but it definitely will in no time :)
After all this 2 years. Finally.

Time to take a serious break now:)

it's all the way for everything now.

THIS IS IT.

Just beat it, beat it, beat it, beat it
No one wants to be defeated
Showin' how funky and strong is your fight
It doesn't matter who's wrong or right
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it
Just beat it, beat it

Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)
Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)
Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)
Billie Jean is not my lover (she is just a girl)

Alright. BANG BANG BANG :D

The greatest barrier ahead is nothing more than the one up in your head.

Move on.

What can we take on trust
in this uncertain life? Happiness, greatness,
pride - nothing is secure, nothing keeps.
~Euripides, Hecuba

i realised. two different situations. but probably. the same feelings afterall.

maybe, that's what mattered most this while.

you left me confused.

Just keep going.

Only the determined ones get rewarded.

i ask myself why my world's crumbling.

why.

控制得了情绪的人也许活得更开心。被情绪控制的人最终还是感到寂寞，有时还感到无助。

我需要学习如何分辨是非， 懂得如何面对自己。

被困在这迷你世界里，有时也让我发觉到错觉也会影响我的心情。

网络，部落阁，清谈室都有个共同之处： 无须流露真正的心情。

也许只有这样，每个人都会得到同样的待遇。也许这样才能让人们知道生活也能够那么轻松，自在。想发言就发言，想把对方臭骂一吨也无须害怕后果不堪设想。

少了情绪，人们的思想也变得稍微简单。

还记得小时候，当我们还未了解情绪与感受这两个词义时，生活还是那么丰富。

情绪与感受，你们为何带给我痛苦与悲伤？

TCC overnight, walking zombie, korean craze.

Panic attacks, GAGA and her POKERFACE.

It's a break for now at least.

What's done is done. What matters now is to learn and move on.

I'll be back stronger than before.

It's not time to just seat around, neither is it time to make a conclusion yet.

One thing for sure, i need to do something meanwhile.

Hang on everyone. I hate to say this but, we are still nowhere near the end.

Fret not cause everything will pay off. Really.

All the best.

TTL.

You know you are trying, but sometimes that's not enough.
People see you trying, but guess what. It's not enough.
You tell yourself not to stop. I'm sorry to say this. It's not enough.

Not enough.
Even the best fall down one day. What makes you think you never do?
Just that people know when to fall. And you chose to fall at this crucial juncture.

At the end of the day, you know who knows it best.
Again, what's the point. So what if you know it best. Like what people always say, you do things for people to see. Not for yourself to know.
Maybe sometimes, life isn't fair. Oh wait. Life has never been fair.

If it was, i wouldn't have been that lucky for that first 16 years of my life.
If it was, i wouldn't have gotten almost everything i wanted for the first 16 years of my life.

Seems like everything's changing. Everything is.

The only thing that isn't. Is fear itself.

Now we know what's the true heartbreaker.

Sometimes, you just need to sit down and think through everything.

You lose and gain something all the time, it's just how you perceive it.
Control your feelings, not the other way around.

It's gonna be another milestone ahead.

Take it on.

Remedy

I can see you killing like a predator

I've been hurt before

Destruction screws me now and forever

But I will not be flawed

Coz what i do is sacrifice

And all I see is lies

No more poison

Killing my emotion

I will not be frozen

Studying is my remedy, remedy, oh

Stop stop preying

Coz I'm not not playing

I'm not frozen

Studying is my remedy, remedy, oh

Move while you're watching me

Kill all the enemy

I've got a remedy

Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

Move while you're watching me

Kill all the enemy

Here is my remedy

Oh, oh-oh, oh-oh

And maybe this does work.

Sacrifice still exists everywhere, and everywhere the elect of each generation suffers for the salvation of the rest.

I want my wings to fly and soar.

For the first time, dirty drains saved 3 lives.

Being who i am.

Some things are not meant to be brought up.

Some things are not meant to be said.

Some things are not meant to be discussed.

Some things are not meant to end up that way.

Some things are not meant to be socially accepted.

Some things are not meant to be explainable.

Some things are not meant to be known.

But when things do change and things get brought up. Face it.

It's just your luck. Your destiny. Your own screwed up fate.

Let things go the way they do.

Let things be what it should be.

And you never know. Even till then. Flaw exists... everywhere.

Perhaps, it's better to avoid it in the first place.

Perhaps, it's better to keep things to yourself.

Perhaps, it's better not to show.

Perhaps, and maybe. Just perhaps.

Time to reflect on all the wrongdoings.

Desperate.

Even miracles take a little time.

Reading helps. Even reading the blogs of others.
I can't waste anymore time. Focus and strive.
Last chance to make a mark.

10 years down the road, I'll look back and realise nothing will be achieved without the effort i'm putting in now.

REGRETS? no way.

I tell myself things will change. And even if things don't change, I'll take it as it is and let destiny lead me on.

Time hides no truth.

98 days.

Life after people.
One thing to be certain, life will continue even after human race die out.

Alternative D-day ending.

Feeling it somehow.

This entire week has been totally magical and weird at the same time.

Gigantic alligators swimming in dams, being warped into different countries by fairies that seemed to possess the ability to do expecto petronas, living in a city of possibilities, studying in a foreign place as a foreign student.

This week is just magical. Let the dreams continue.

I need to relieve some tension.

The tough gets going...

Leave me there in that corner and let me be. I'll be ok once i sort out everything.
Sleep does more harm than good.

I need time to recover. I need the space to breathe.
Still finding that solution.

Back after a long while. It's pretty cool to realise that my results are worse than before. Shall not rant about it now.

Let's talk about.... Senior Dinner and Dance. I can't wait to see how the response will be. And the venue's at Fullerton hotel, at a pricey 95 bucks though.

Theme: Royale.
Well after knowing the theme, i think checking the internet will give you a better idea of what royale... suggests.

Many people is asking what exactly does Royale mean so.

Go to http://google.com
Type Royale.
Click search.

Let's see.
1. Download Royale theme for Windows XP.
2.Casino Royale

And the list goes on.

http://akimages.crossmediaservices.com/dyn_li/200.0.88.0/Retailers/CanadianTire/080222ENG_DE309_03_1_4a.JPG

Maybe. This.

ROYALE. Your interpretation.

Double kill.

2 more to go. And wipe out the bad memories.

Maybe, tests are meant to demoralise.

It happened too many times i choose to believe CT2s exist in my nightmares.

2 more. If that helps. And everyone hang on.

i just need a little breakthrough.

I need it. now.

back soon.

HEYOS.

CHEM YOU SUCK!

suck

suck.

SUCK.

SUCKK.

SUCCKKK.

asshole.

screw off you bloody chem.

shaln't waste my time on you. useless fool.

GET OUT OF MY LIFE.

econs here i come :D

In life, you need to factor in entertainment and rest.

I'm sorry to conclude i lack both. Neither entertainment nor rest.

I don't wish to be a hero. I don't wish to leave a legend behind. All i want is to achieve my dreams and that's it. There's no need for fame and glory.

I'm breaking down both emotionally and physically. Tear me apart if you wish because i know this will never end. Trample on me if you think it gets you higher. Stab me till i bleed no more.

But at the end of the day, i know i'll grow stronger. Or at least i hope i will. I will live on to prove all others wrong. And again, if you ever ask me whether i choose to be smart or hardworking, i'll choose the latter.

I'm sorry i've lost my senses these days but i'll get it back.

I just need self believe and that's all that is needed.

And hopefully i don't get a heart attack from all these stressors.

Mad World

Adam Lambert

All around are me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
And their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrows
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

(Chorus)

And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which in dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very very,
Mad world, Mad world

Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy birthday, happy birthday
And they feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me

[Chorus]

And I find it kind of funny,
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I fine it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very very
Mad world, Mad world
Mad world, Mad world

I'm really living in this mad mad world.

Nuff said.

Noise inducing headaches.

Stop it. Seriously.

Everything's behind you
But the whole place signs besides you
Living in every moment
Have I wasted all your time

Michael Jackson's dead.

95 new h1n1 cases.

I realised everything's getting tougher. Probably even the fight against viruses and bacteria and all other pathogens. It's a real time battle against these minuscule microscopic living/non-living organism.

And i doubt i'll be able to survive these nonsense somehow.

Jealousy kills. And that becomes so obvious now i can't seem to mask it.

Holiday's aint extended, at least the exams were.

And i just realised it's youth day on 6th july.

What a youth day trying to mug for exams.

Back to... mugging. And life goes on.

PS: I don't have cancer.

I have no idea what to do now. Let the game play on since there's no way back. :)

Hopefully all players end up winning somehow. LOL.

I'm going mad.

And it's still some distance away from that goal.

Maybe i'm better off, doing something like... selling ice cream down the street.

Sanity and studying don't go together.

I'm back to square 1.

Plain tired. And thanks to those jokers in Macs just now trying to stage a show, i had to finish up the mindmap at home -.-

Amazing race tmr? 830am:) I hope i'll be on time. LOL. :X

and please. 1 more week of holidays. All considerations will be greatly appreciated.

REVENGE OF THE FALLEN :D

and i wonder what that means at the end of the day.

This is how it works
You're young until you're not
You love until you don't
You try until you can't
You laugh until you cry
You cry until you laugh
And everyone must breathe
Until their dying breath

I'm sure everyone's getting panicky over CT2s now. The thing is, determination gets you everywhere. Hang on everyone.

Probably i care more than anyone do because i realise i do care. Quite a lot.

Time is running out. But who cares. I need to blog.
Revising at home is never efficient. NEVER. And that's probably why kenrick and vic are happily mugging their night out at the airport. I can never do that :)

It's probably the last break left before the major As, gosh. Yes.

i NEED sleep. Probably that's why i have been waking up only to realise the sun's on top of me. :D
I've been having this weird craving for food though most of the time it's just mere cravings to LOOK and not consume them.

Bye fries, chips and everything deemed to be detrimental to my health. :D

Medical checkup tomorrow. Pes _? You fill it up for me.

It's weird to realise that i do want to know more. Though it may not be the best thing to do... but who cares. Seriously. :)

Imagine being trapped in a crystal ball.
Imagine the wheels of the car being used as car seats while the steering wheel's being used as tires instead.
I wonder how it feels like having to see the world in a totally different perspective.

It's weird to think about this at this late hour, but who cares.

Geek-fied.

Everything seemed like a dream.

What Tattoo should you have?

Your Result: Words

You're very picky about what you would have. Your favorite scripture, the name of your child or parent, or something along those lines fits you best. Whatever line you choose, everyone will know it is very close to your heart.

Choose to believe in what you really do and not follow the status quo... if need be.

Romance and all its strategy
Leaves me battling with my pride
But through all the insecurity
Some tenderness survives
Im just another writer
Still trapped within my truth
A hesitant prize fighter
Still trapped within my youth

So what's next in line ?

Finally feeling better after getting my chillout session.
I just required a break and i got one. :)

Again, good things never lasts.
Back to that old and ironclad routine.


For some reason i cannot explain.
Maybe i really can't.

regrets. too many to count.

i just want to know what's upcoming.
it's getting exasperating yet fascinating at the same time.

i realise. i lost control of everything. my thoughts, my feelings. everything.

i need a chillout session. urgently.

why?

What is your inner self?


Your Result: A Smokelike Person

You tend to hide you emotions. You are at a very low point in life. You almost seem to not want to go on anymore. Fade a way into smoke not exist. You feel alone in life. You feel as if no body could ever understand you. But there is only one thing that clings you to life. You want to belong. But you dont want to change. You want to be around people you want to have a reason to go on. You are sometimes envious of other people's seemingly perfect lives. If you want to have a seemingly perfect life, then you should start hanging around warm sunlike people, or friendly earthlike people, or tell your problems to an quiet listener moon person. And you always have a speck of hope inside of you. Even if you feel all hope is lost, hope is hard to fully kill. so nurture and try to see life in different eyes, and maybe it'll be a brighter world.

And i wonder why.

There's no point doing things we don't like.

I'm not a fan of SJ but yea.

Super Junior - It's You

Sit down, talk about it and think through what you had experienced.

Maybe what everyone said was right. Too naive, too insensitive.
Well. The most probable reason for my downfall.

When love is just another feeling people think they understand.
When hate is just another expression people use to show displeasure.
When sorrow is just another feeling they use casually to gain sympathy.
When lies is just another way to live through life.

Tell me what makes me different from others.
Tell me what makes the world different from me.
Tell me why the days never seemed any better.
Tell me why.

Searching for an answer.

I'm trying to believe there's still a reason for my existence.
I'm trying to believe there's still a reason for me to live my life to the fullest.
365 days.
i realised, things didn't change for the better.
I didn't know what were the reason for all the actions.


Like i said before. I don't know what's wrong.
And i'm glad you people realised i am just like any other friend of yours.
One who's insecure... at times.

The greatest fear is not rejection itself.
But the fear of what comes after rejection.

LOVE. Decode it.

No Boundaries
American Idol 8 Finale Coronation Song

Ohh
Seconds hours so many days
You know what you want but how long can you wait
Every moment lasts forever
When you feel you've lost your way
What if my chances were already gone
I started believing that I could be wrong
But you gave me one good reason
To fight and never walk away
So here I am still holding on

With every step you climb another mountain
Every breath it's harder to believe
You'll make it through the pain
Weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing
Just when you think the road is going no where
Just when you almost gave up all your dreams
They take you by the hand and show you that you can
There are no boundaries
There are no boundaries

I fought to the limit you stand on the edge
What if today is as good as it gets
Don't know where the future's headed
Nothing's gonna bring me down
Jumped every bridge I've run every line
I risk being safe, I always knew why
I always knew why
So here I am still holding on

With every step you climb another mountain
Every breath it's harder to believe
You'll make it through the pain
Weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing
Just when you think the road is going no where
Just when you almost gave up all your dreams
They take you by the hand and show you that you can

You can go higher
You can go deeper
There are no boundaries
Above and beneath you
Break every rule cause there's nothing between you and your dreams

With every step you climb another mountain
Every breath it's harder to believe
You'll make it through the pain
Weather the hurricanes
To get to that one thing
Just when you think the road is going no where
Just when you almost gave up everything
They take you by the hand and show you that you can
There are no boundaries
There are no boundaries
There are no boundaries
No boundaries
Yeah, there are no boundaries



Definitely, boundaries are set to restrict us from going off course.
However, the true fact is: Boundaries just prevents you from exploring your greatest dreams.

With days, i found a true meaning in what i call LIFE.
It's more than before. I hope it's finally a true understanding.